Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Grandfather’s Eyes Light Up While Describing Memories Of Old Country Buffet

The Onion

Mexico Elects First Female President

The Onion

‘It Is Their Finest Album Yet,’ Reads Press Release Written By Band’s Bassist

The Onion

Parents Devote Every Second To Getting Daughter Into Good Harem

The Onion

Cold, Dark Tiny House

The Onion

Biden Signs Executive Order Restricting Asylum

The Onion

Yellowstone Bison Gores Woman Who Refused To Delete Unflattering Photograph

The Onion

Day In My Life As A Noncorporeal Transdimensional Orb

The Onion

Apologetic Pat McAfee Makes Donation To Charity That Helps White Bitches

The Onion

Big Toe Would Kill To Be Slender, Graceful Second Toe

The Onion

Nation Forgets What It Was They Didn’t Like About O.J. Simpson

The Onion

Man Riding Manic Episode Right To The Shitting Stars

The Onion

Biden Signs Executive Order To Deport All 340 Million Americans And Start From Scratch

The Onion

Study Finds Only 1 In 3 Americans Can Name Their Representative’s Corporate Donors

The Onion

Chick-Fil-A Admits To Enjoying Prostate Stimulation On Occasion

The Onion

Senate Passes Emergency Border Funding To Prevent Female Leadership From Spreading To U.S.

The Onion

Gorilla Mother Constantly Reminding Children To Slouch

The Onion

Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter This Townhouse

The Onion

Man With Suspended License Joins Court Zoom Call While Driving

The Onion

Cult Leader Not Even Charismatic

The Onion