Dwayne
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Government Shutdown Causes Flight Delays
The Onion
satire
news
California To Phase Out Ultra-Processed Foods In School Lunches
The Onion
satire
news
Political Profile: Russell Vought
The Onion
satire
news
‘Try Not To Stare At Her Mouth,’ Says Mom In Ominous Update On Grandma’s Health
The Onion
news
satire
Childhood Best Friend Would Never Make The Cut Now
The Onion
news
satire
Financial Advisors Recommend Throwing Away Unopened Bills
The Onion
satire
news
Impressionable Teen Falls In With Wrong Socioeconomic Class
The Onion
news
satire
Ghoul Americans Celebrate Demonic Heritage Month
The Onion
news
satire
Aaron Rodgers Suffers Torn Cerebellum After Attempting Telepathic Audible
The Onion
news
satire
AI Deepfakes Of Dead Celebrities Spark Outrage
The Onion
satire
news
ICE Raids: Myth Vs. Fact
The Onion
news
satire
ICE Boasts Zero Murders Committed By 5-Year-Olds Since Child Detainments Began
The Onion
satire
news
Richard Blakely
The Onion
news
satire
Locust Humiliated Swarm He Organized Only Got 40 Million Attendees
The Onion
news
satire
Nicole Kidman Tosses ‘The Garfield Movie’ Soundtrack Onto Burn Pile
The Onion
satire
news
Central European Guy At Other End Of Bar Watching Some Sport With Mallets On Phone
The Onion
satire
news
Paul McCartney Now Openly Referring To Self As ‘Last-Living Beatle’
The Onion
satire
news
‘Task’ Teams Up With Wawa For New Fentanyl Brick Hoagie
The Onion
satire
news
The Onion Investigates: Jeffrey Epstein
The Onion
news
satire
Tyra Banks Releases Hot Ice Cream
The Onion
news
satire