Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Big Open Mouth Coming At Woman’s Face Says She So Beautiful And Wants To Kiss Her

The Onion

Alarming Report Finds Nation’s Fuckers Now Have 83% More Nerve

The Onion

Controversial Website WikiHead Rates Celebrities Based On Facial Features, Hair

The Onion

Tim Walz Unveils New Retro-Futurist Persona After Feeling Boxed In By Folksy Image

The Onion

Tim Walz Writes ‘Great Job’ On Supporter’s Baby

The Onion

Inside The DNC’s Convention Center

The Onion

Thousands Of Pro-Palestinian Protesters Gather Outside DNC

The Onion

Man Who Ate Wings For Dinner Forced To Sit On Towel For Car Ride Home

The Onion

Grandpa Racist Toward Country That No Longer Exists

The Onion

Earth Towed, Impounded After Illegally Parking In Milky Way

The Onion

Portillo’s Offers DNC Attendees Free Hot Dog If Hillary Clinton Sinks Half-Court Shot

The Onion

Trump Hoping To Disrupt DNC News Cycle By Eating Live Rat On Television

The Onion

Hulk Hogan Rips Open Shirt At DNC To Reveal Message: ‘I Just Love Events’

The Onion

Here’s Why I Decided To Buy ‘The Onion’

The Onion

‘Ketamine Queen’ Charged In Connection With Matthew Perry’s Death

The Onion

Philosopher’s Friends Constantly Pitching Him Ideas For Dilemmas

The Onion

Increasingly Concerned Tim Walz Asks DNC Volunteer Where Giant Corn Dog Stand Is

The Onion

Puzzled Coworkers Not Sure Why Man Telling Them He Has Cancer

The Onion

Gender-Affirming Care: Myth Vs. Fact

The Onion

Man Found Strapped To Gurney, Injected With Poison In Execution-Style Killing

The Onion