Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

‘So, Which One’s Yours?’ Asks Doug Emhoff Trying To Make Small Talk With Melania Backstage

The Onion

Dick Cheney To Vote For Harris

The Onion

Trump Trains For Debate By Arguing With Side Of Beef Hanging In Meat Locker

The Onion

Unloading At College

The Onion

Husband Files For Divorce After DNA Test Reveals Child Only Shares Half His Genes

The Onion

Man Gets Triple Bypass Reversed After Deciding He Wants Third Heart Attack

The Onion

Right-Wing Influencers Covertly Funded By Russia

The Onion

Man Can’t Believe What A Dumbass Cartoon Character Is

The Onion

Cybertruck Owner Brags About High-Tech Pedal That Makes Vehicle Accelerate When Pressed 

The Onion

Phone Manually Turned Off With Intensity Of Mobster Smothering Witness With Pillow

The Onion

Kamala Harris Struggling To Button Pantsuit After Month Of Hanging Out With Tim Walz

The Onion

Pros And Cons Of Reparations

The Onion

Tom Brady Provides Detailed Analysis Of How Easy It Would Be For Him To Take Dak Prescott’s Job

The Onion

Bengals Coaching Staff Holding Breath After Joe Burrow Endures Rough High-Five

The Onion

Hunter Biden Pleads Guilty To Federal Tax Charges

The Onion

Horrified Taylor Swift Realizes Football Happens Every Year

The Onion

Jimmy Carter Awakens To Learn He Outlived Every Single Person In America

The Onion

Venezuelan President Declares Christmas In October

The Onion

Tips For Growing Your TikTok Following

The Onion

New Antigravity Hover Shoes Protect Dogs’ Paws From Anything Within 6 Inches Of Ground

The Onion