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The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Archaeologists Find Marble Statue Of Ancient God In A Sewer

The Onion

Study Finds Increased Cognitive Function Linked To Being Released From Headlock

The Onion

Caitlin Clark Supplements Rookie Salary By Taking Adjunct Professor Of Basketball Job

The Onion

Point/Counterpoint: Hillary Clinton Is Polling Ahead Of Joe Biden vs. Did Somebody Say Hillary Clinton?

The Onion

Locals Fire Water Pistols At Visitors During Barcelona’s Anti-Tourist Protests

The Onion

Wimbledon Trying To Excite Us, But The Ball Still Just Goes Back And Forth All Day

The Onion

Biden Team Holds Rapid-Fire Series Of Public Events Featuring President Waving From Very Far Away

The Onion

Bored Equifax Sees How Much They Can Lower Man’s Credit Score Before He Kills Himself

The Onion

Study: More Women Forgoing IVF In Favor Of Hoping For Surprise Baby On Toilet

The Onion

Wimbledon Enters Third Round Of Centuples Tournament

The Onion

Highlights From The Heritage Foundation’s ‘Project 2025’

The Onion

Tearful Boston Dynamics Engineer Forced To Drown Unwanted Robot Puppies

The Onion

Tourist Visiting California Excited To Try One Of Those Vegetables He’s Heard So Much About

The Onion

LARPer With Food Allergies Ruining Sense Of Immersion

The Onion

Catholic Church Courts Youth By Adding Badass Deity With Robotic Falcon Head

The Onion

Pros And Cons Of Granting Trump Presidential Immunity

The Onion

America Celebrates Fourth Of July

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A Day In The Life Of Steve Bannon In Federal Prison

The Onion

Coked-Up Nation Loves This Fucking Guy

The Onion

Nearly Half Of All Borrowers Have Not Restarted Student Loan Payments

The Onion