Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Trump Accepts GOP Nomination

The Onion

The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Simone Biles

The Onion

Petting Zoo Selling Toddler Fingers For 25 Cents

The Onion

MLB Reminds White Sox That Games Televised

The Onion

Plastic Surgeon Tears New Wife Down To The Studs

The Onion

Completely Alone Man Really Thought Blowing Out Birthday Candle In Dark Apartment Would Have Cheered Him Up

The Onion

Archaeologists Celebrate After Uncovering Ancient Certificate Congratulating Them For Finding All The Stuff

The Onion

Trump On Accepting Nomination: ‘This Is Boring, I’m So Bored’

The Onion

Trump: ‘You All Look Really Stupid With Those Things On Your Head’

The Onion

Judge Dismisses Trump Classified Documents Case

The Onion

Biden Told He Won Election As Aide Gently Closes His Eyes

The Onion

Usha Vance Gently Corrects RNC Usher Attempting To Deport Her

The Onion

Timeline Of Assassination Attempts In The United States

The Onion

Sex Shop Has Gumball Machine

The Onion

That Last Drink The One That Did It, Report Hungover Sources

The Onion

Sweet Angel Kitty Babies Go Num Num Num On Mommy’s Corpse

The Onion

Investigation Finds Secret Service Failed To Account For Nation’s 393 Million Guns

The Onion

Terminally Nil

The Onion

Jacked Guy Wearing Suit Must Have It All Figured Out

The Onion

Report: Maybe Going To Strip Club For First Time Exactly What Isolated 33-Year-Old Needs

The Onion