Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Paralyzed High School Quarterback Praised As Hero For Not Suing

The Onion

Cautious Study Finds Whatever Everyone Else Found

The Onion

Controversial Ad Reveals Mr. Clean Only Dates Black Women

The Onion

The Onion Reviews ‘The Fast And The Furious’

The Onion

Cool Skydiver Only Uses One Parachute Strap

The Onion

Sources Allege Tim Walz’s ‘Aw, Shucks’ Persona Merely Facade Concealing True ‘Gee Whiz’ Tendencies

The Onion

LinkedIn Congratulates Man On 5 Years At Dead-End Job Without Killing Himself

The Onion

How Universities Are Cracking Down On Palestine Protests

The Onion

Bride Being Awfully Picky About Wedding Cake For Someone Who Just Got Free Flight From Cambodia

The Onion

Moviegoers Distracted By Christian Family Praying Over M&M’s

The Onion

Everyone In Restaurant Jealous Of Toddler Who Gets To Wear Pajamas And Watch iPad

The Onion

Cat Scientists Theorize About Third Type Of Food That Neither Wet Nor Dry

The Onion

4-Year-Old Museum-Goer Accidentally Shatters Bronze Age Jar

The Onion

Listeria Outbreak Prompts Man To Continue Eating Deli Meat Like Nothing Wrong

The Onion

Francis Scott Key Estate Sends Cease-And-Desist To Trump For Playing ‘Star-Spangled Banner’ At Rally

The Onion

Trump Faces Revised Election Interference Indictment

The Onion

Chappell Roan: We Hid In The Alley Behind Her Hotel, Knocked Out A Concierge On His Smoke Break, Stole His Uniform, Used It To Sneak Into The Kitchen, And Hid Inside Her Room Service Trolley, And She Was A Complete, Ungrateful Bitch About It

The Onion

Study Links Brief Spike In Happiness To Little Bubbles Floating Off Dish Soap Bottle

The Onion

Tips For Starting A Book Club

The Onion

Pete Buttigieg Sneaks In After Midnight With Tire Tracks On Collar

The Onion