Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Chuck Schumer

The Onion

Aaron Rodgers Fuming That NFL Hasn’t Added Expansion Team To Sign Him

The Onion

Musk Announces All 340 Million Americans Must Strip And Take Turn Pushing The Wheel Of Pain 

The Onion

Trump Calmly Reminds Nation That Desire The Root Of All Suffering

The Onion

Communion Wafer ‘Miracle’ Turns Out To Be Bacteria

The Onion

CNBC Hosts Sit In Stunned Silence For 19th Consecutive Hour

The Onion

Cory Booker Sets Record For Longest Fingernails On Senate Floor

The Onion

Trump Informs Nation They Better Start Liking Those Little Canned Wieners

The Onion

Inside Elon Musk’s Texas Compound

The Onion

Israel Claims Slain Palestinian Rescue Workers Didn’t Properly Identify Selves As Human Beings

The Onion

Artist Profile: Morgan Wallen

The Onion

Man Already Having Bad Day Deported To Salvadoran Mega-Prison

The Onion

Dog Loves Bungee Jumping, Owner Of Bungee-Jumping Dog Reports

The Onion

U.S. Food Banks Struggle Under Funding Cuts

The Onion

SeaWorld Visitors Delighted By Live Garbage-Patch Feeding

The Onion

Washington Monument Collapses After Someone Pulls Loose Block

The Onion

DEA Classifies Red Wine As Schedule I Drug To Spite Ex-Wife 

The Onion

Trump ‘Not Joking’ About Seeking Third Term

The Onion

Attorney General Seeks Death Penalty For All UnitedHealthcare Customers

The Onion

College Campus Tour Ends Inside Unmarked ICE Vehicle

The Onion