Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Travis Kelce Caught Fingering Taylor Swift Under Super Bowl Bleachers

The Onion

Trump Asks Which One The Ball

The Onion

Secret Service Agent Starstruck After Seeing Taylor Swift’s Bodyguards

The Onion

Travis Kelce Plays Super Bowl In Gucci Bucket Helmet

The Onion

Man Hangs Arm Off Couch For Rest Of Game Instead Of Washing Sauce Off Fingers

The Onion

Eagles Score On 99-Yard Tush Push

The Onion

Super Bowl Coin Toss Fractures World Into Infinite Multiverses Where Eagles Win, Lose, Earth Explodes

The Onion

Andy Reid Removes Bald Cap for National Anthem

The Onion

NFL Confirms Players Will Still Wear ‘Fight Bigotry’ Jockstraps

The Onion

Mitch McConnell Leaves Capitol In Wheelchair After Fall

The Onion

Artist Profile: Kendrick Lamar

The Onion

Trump Struggling To Remember How He Related To Elon Musk

The Onion

Pioneering Female Archaeologist In Google Doodle Bears Silent Witness To Man’s Search For ‘Zootopia’ Porn

The Onion

Trump Proposes U.S. Takeover Of Gaza

The Onion

Mitch McConnell Vows To Continue Falling Down Stairs In Face Of Fascist Takeover

The Onion

NBC Producers Deny Using AI In New Series ‘Detective Fireman Lawyer Chicago Los Angeles Show’

The Onion

‘The Sims’ Turns 25

The Onion

Jealous Trump Boys Try To Convince Father That Barron A DEI

The Onion

Melania Trump Holds Paint Swatches Up Against Bellowing Void

The Onion

Trump Announces U.S. Will Relocate Panama Canal To American Soil

The Onion