Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Artist Profile: Sabrina Carpenter

The Onion

Juul Unveils New E-Solvent Can For Huffers

The Onion

Yahweh Or The Highway

The Onion

Scientists Awestruck By Biodiversity Within Single Italian Sub

The Onion

Panicked Tim Walz Trapped In Football Metaphor For Third Consecutive Day

The Onion

Aides Beg J.D. Vance To Stop Carrying Model Of Woman’s Pelvis While Meeting Voters 

The Onion

RFK Jr. Calls Democratic Party Unrecognizable For Failure To Automatically Grant Position To Kennedy

The Onion

Child Standing With Both Arms Down Pants

The Onion

Prettiest Girl At Bachelorette Party Demands Everyone Look Pretty

The Onion

Jennifer Lopez Files For Divorce From Ben Affleck

The Onion

Fact-Checking The GOP’s Claims About Kamala Harris

The Onion

20% Of Swedish Brown Bears To Be Killed In Annual Hunt

The Onion

Grandmother Hamster Overly Critical Of Way Daughter Eats Babies

The Onion

Stranded NASA Astronauts Take Emergency Slide Back To Earth

The Onion

Improved Prosthetic Hand Only Chokes Owner 63% Of Time

The Onion

DNC Attendees Set Massive Wooden Donkey Ablaze To Ensure 4 More Years Of Liberal Rule

The Onion

Doug Emhoff Sends Blurry Picture Of Harris Speaking To Family Group Chat

The Onion

Our Historic Front Page: August 2024

The Onion

The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson

The Onion

Stammering Democrats Unsure How To Accept Positive Feedback

The Onion