The post Lakers Fans Furious As Bam Adebayo Dies In Even Worse Helicopter Crash appeared first on The Onion.

MILWAUKEE—Accusing the actress of a grotesque act that showed profound insensitivity, Kate Hudson found herself under fire Thursday for performing in Wisconsinface for her most recent film, Song Sung Blue. “It’s so insulting to see someone who’s obviously never been anywhere near cheese curds or a Friday night fish fry do this hurtful caricature of us,” said Kenosha […]

The post Kate Hudson Under Fire For Doing Wisconsinface In ‘Song Sung Blue’ appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON—Maintaining that his conduct was well within the guidelines for the solemn occasion, President Trump on Thursday defended his decision to wear a fruit hat while samba dancing during the dignified transfer of soldiers killed in Iran. “There’s no reason I can’t honor the sacrifice of these brave men and women while wearing a headdress […]

The post Trump Defends Wearing Fruit Hat, Samba Dancing During Dignified Transfer appeared first on The Onion.

Harry Styles has released Kiss All the Time. Disco, Occasionally, his fourth studio album. The pop star sat down with The Onion to explain the meaning behind each track. “Aperture”: “I typed ‘hole’ into powerthesaurus.com.” “American Girls”: “My favorite is Samantha, but Kit is a very close second.” “What Makes You Beautiful”: “I hope Kobalt […]

The post Harry Styles Breaks Down His New Album Track By Track appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON—Claiming their mind was solely occupied by the hope of curling up in a ball and sleeping as long as they were allowed, the entire U.S. populace told reporters Thursday they lacked the strength to form an opinion on Donald Glover’s casting as the voice of Yoshi in The Super Mario Galaxy Movie. “At some […]

The post Exhausted Nation Lacks Strength To Form Opinion On Donald Glover Being Voice Of Yoshi appeared first on The Onion.