Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Uber Introduces Women-Only Option Nationwide

Uber launched a feature that allows both women riders and drivers across the U.S. to be exclusively matched with other women for trips, expanding a pilot program intended to address safety concerns. What do you think?

The post Uber Introduces Women-Only Option Nationwide appeared first on The Onion.

Health Speculations Swirl After Trump Screams, ‘Fuck! I’m Dying!’

WASHINGTON—Further fueling speculation that the commander-in-chief might have undisclosed medical conditions, rumors regarding President Trump’s health swirled Friday after he screamed, “Fuck! I’m dying!” during a press conference. “Fuck! I’m fucking dying! Oh God, it hurts! Ahhhhhhh!” Trump said in response to a question about the ongoing war in Iran, sparking fervent discussion among Beltway […]

The post Health Speculations Swirl After Trump Screams, ‘Fuck! I’m Dying!’ appeared first on The Onion.

Study: Humans Evolved Opposable Thumbs To Signal ‘All Good’ To Buddies After Falling Off Roof

LOS ANGELES—In a discovery many have hailed as a milestone in the field, a new study published Friday by scientists at the University of California, Los Angeles, found that humans likely developed opposable thumbs to signal “all good” to their buddies after falling off the roof. “New evidence suggests hominids first evolved this movable appendage […]

The post Study: Humans Evolved Opposable Thumbs To Signal ‘All Good’ To Buddies After Falling Off Roof appeared first on The Onion.

Horse Cast As Horse In Live Action ‘Tangled’ Remake

The post Horse Cast As Horse In Live Action ‘Tangled’ Remake appeared first on The Onion.

The Onion’s 2026 Oscars Best Picture Guide

The 98th Academy Awards will take place March 15 at the Dolby Theater. The Onion examines the 10 contenders in this year’s Best Picture race.  Bugonia Synopsis: A conspiracy theorist attempts to uncover a CEO’s sinister plot that is oddly devoid of pedophiles. Defining Line: “Prepare to be bald, idiot!” Prospects: Slim, but they said […]

The post The Onion’s 2026 Oscars Best Picture Guide appeared first on The Onion.