The 2034 World Cup was officially awarded to Saudi Arabia, raising concerns from human rights groups about the safety of migrant workers. What do you think?

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PALM BEACH, FL—Despite begging to attend the party in his suit like every other member of Donald Trump’s future cabinet, Vice President-elect JD Vance was reportedly forced to dress as an elf Friday for the Mar-a-Lago Christmas party. “Hey everyone, I’m JD, the Christmas elf!” the 40-year-old Ohio senator said in a high-pitched voice, prancing […]

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Time named Trump their choice for Person Of The Year for the second time, recognizing the president-elect as the individual or group deemed to have wielded the greatest influence on global affairs “for good or for ill.” What do you think?

The post Trump Named ‘Time’ Person Of The Year For Second Time appeared first on The Onion.

HOUSTON—In a devastating accident that left the entire downtown area in smoldering ruins, officials confirmed Tuesday that the Houston skyline had been knocked over by a large, playful sheepdog named Gus. According to eyewitnesses, the 3-year-old Old English sheepdog tore through the business district,bumping into the TC Energy Center and whacking over the JPMorgan Chase Tower […]

The post Large, Playful Sheepdog Knocks Over Houston Skyline appeared first on The Onion.

By Commander Byxxurian Greetings, earthlings. I am Commander Byxxurian from Nebula Vriphlaxor-9. I come bearing a message of utmost importance from the galactic consortium. Its intended recipient is one who lives among you, and if it is not delivered quickly, then I fear all hope will be lost. Please, we do not have much time. […]

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