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CDC Recommends Eating A Nice Crisp Shiny Apple Instead Of Having Unprotected Sex from The Onion RSS feed.

CDC Recommends Eating A Nice Crisp Shiny Apple Instead Of Having Unprotected Sex

ATLANTA—Claiming that the experience could provide as much satisfaction as unsafe sex, a new report released by the Centers for Disease Control this week recommends Americans eat a nice, shiny apple instead of having unprotected intercourse. “What we are finding is that the risks associated with irresponsible sexual acts far exceed those of chomping on […]

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