DES MOINES, IA—Rushing to deploy the temporary infrastructure as a heatwave enveloped the region, Iowa officials announced Monday that they would open emergency cooling stations to provide relief to mayo-based dishes. “Effective immediately, we’re installing portable air-conditioners and power misters across the state to ensure our mayonnaise-filled salads make it through this heatwave safely,” said Emergency […]

The post Iowa Opens Emergency Cooling Stations For Mayo-Based Dishes appeared first on The Onion.