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Dad Impressed By How Easily New Lawn Mower Tore Through Son’s Leg from The Onion RSS feed.

Dad Impressed By How Easily New Lawn Mower Tore Through Son’s Leg

DANBURY, CT—Expressing immense satisfaction with the recently purchased device’s performance, area dad Frank Hoyer confirmed Friday that he was impressed by how easily a new lawn mower tore through his son Alan’s leg. “Look at this thing go—didn’t even hiccup gliding through all that tibia!” Hoyer said as he wiped a streak of blood from […]

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