Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Sulking Trump Totally Unable To Enjoy Advanced Screening Of ‘Bad Boys: Ride Or Die’

The Onion

Pete Buttigieg Neatly Files Flattened Possum Into Roadkill Folder

The Onion

Hims Now Selling Bags Of Chips For Depressed, Impotent Losers Who Are Also Hungry

The Onion

D.C. Zoo To Receive 2 New Pandas

The Onion

Nation Shrugs After Hearing Trump Guilty Verdict, Unpauses ‘MILF Manor’

The Onion

BREAKING: BIG WORDS MEAN BIG THING HAPPEN

The Onion

Trump: ‘We’ll Take This All The Way To The Supreme Court I Appointed’

The Onion

Trump Boys Attempt To Bribe Juror With Briefcase Full Of Grape Uncrustables

The Onion

World Series Of Poker Entrants Play One Hand Face-Up So Everyone Can Learn Rules

The Onion

Samuel Alito: ‘I Tried To Take The Flag Down, But My Wife Hit Me. She Hits Me Every Night’

The Onion

Louisiana Law Criminalizes Approaching Police Officers

The Onion

Bedminster, Bath and Beyond

The Onion

Dalai Lama Agrees To Box Pope For Charity

The Onion

U.S. Army Recruiter Has Bound, Gagged Civilian That Teen Can Shoot Right Now If He Enlists

The Onion

New Hormone-Free IUD Wards Off Sperm With Steady Emission Of Police-Grade Pepper Spray

The Onion

Musician’s Contract Requires Venue To Provide Validation Artist Never Got

The Onion

Price Of Ancient Tribal Burial Site Being Used As Golf Course To Be Decided By Jury

The Onion

Pope Francis Issues Apology For Using Slur For Gay Men

The Onion

Dialect Coach Hired To Class Up Nation Before Big Date With Wealthy Man

The Onion

Dermatologists Advise Against Taking Bite Of Facial Cream

The Onion