Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

How Canadians Are Fighting Back Against U.S. Tariffs

The Onion

Report: More Americans Moving Away From Urban Areas For Rural Life Where They Have Escalating Feud With Beaver

The Onion

Pale Trump Boys Ask When They Can Stop Giving Uncle Elon Blood

The Onion

CEO’s Son Explains Why He Refuses To Let Father Help Him Sexually Harass Subordinates

The Onion

Trump Announces New Visa Tier For Immigrants Who Will Be Friends With Barron

The Onion

Feds Uncover Terabytes Of Free Speech During Raid Of Protestor’s Residence

The Onion

March Madness By The Numbers

The Onion

‘Dirty Rain’ Falls Over Multiple States

The Onion

Egg Companies Assure Customers Dozen Has Always Meant 9

The Onion

Pronatalist Sex Ed Class Requires Students To Care For 14 Sacks Of Flour

The Onion

Pills: Can We Get Some? We’re Really Hurting Right Now

The Onion

Tesla Dealerships Attacked With Molotov Cocktails

The Onion

Hospitalized Toddler To Spend Rest Of Life Associating Mickey Mouse With Physical Pain

The Onion

Prospective Car Buyer Takes SUV Out For Test Hit And Run

The Onion

Only Good-Looking Person In Office Mingles With Hideous Coworkers Like Missionary Among Lepers

The Onion

Local Teen Invents Masturbation

The Onion

Taylor Swift Spends Evening Editing Spreadsheet Ranking All Her Friendships

The Onion

Report Finds Ticketmaster Controls 80% Of Nation’s Middle School Talent Shows

The Onion

Elon Musk Creates Federal Employee Revenge Porn Database

The Onion

Nation Uses Extra Hour Of Daylight To Sun Perineums Even Harder

The Onion