Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Port-A-Potty Paraded Around On Flatbed Truck Like Homecoming Queen

The Onion

Basic Woman’s Entire Personality Revolves Around Things She Enjoys

The Onion

Dejected Schumer Superfan Can’t Believe He Dropped $10,000 On VIP Party Package

The Onion

Senile Grandma Tries To Set Up Grandkids With Each Other

The Onion

Texas Implements Mandatory 6-Month Quarantine For Anyone Who Has Watched ‘Will And Grace’

The Onion

Overdue Library Book Returned After 99 Years

The Onion

The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Lady Gaga

The Onion

Oversized Leprechaun Hat Left At Home On St. Patrick’s Day To Avoid Damaging It

The Onion

Stepson Liked With All Of Man’s Heart

The Onion

128 New Moons Found Orbiting Saturn

The Onion

JD Vance’s French Horn Solo Booed At Kennedy Center

The Onion

RFK Jr. Claims Measles Can Be Cured With A Good Concealer

The Onion

Chuck Schumer Helps Pull Democrats Back From Brink Of Courage

The Onion

Tennessee Man Shot By Dog

The Onion

Pale Trump Boys Ask When They Can Stop Giving Uncle Elon Blood

The Onion

Bachelorette Party Provides Friends Valuable Time To Get High With Bride’s Cousin

The Onion

Report: More Americans Moving Away From Urban Areas For Rural Life Where They Have Escalating Feud With Beaver

The Onion

How Canadians Are Fighting Back Against U.S. Tariffs

The Onion

CEO’s Son Explains Why He Refuses To Let Father Help Him Sexually Harass Subordinates

The Onion

Trump Announces New Visa Tier For Immigrants Who Will Be Friends With Barron

The Onion