Ynyshir, a Welsh restaurant with two Michelin stars, has been given a one star hygiene rating by food standards inspectors, with the chef responding to the score by claiming he has “the highest standards in the world.” What do you think?

The post Two-Star Michelin Restaurant Given One-Star Hygiene Rating appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTON—Expressing deep fondness for those long-gone halcyon days, the U.S. population collectively yearned Tuesday for the relative calm of the “president is a giant pedophile” news cycle. “It was a simpler time then, back when all people wanted to talk about was the leader of the country molesting underage girls,” said Denver resident Scott Munoz, […]

The post Nation Yearns For Relative Calm Of ‘President A Giant Pedophile’ News Cycle appeared first on The Onion.

LONDON—Determined to get to the bottom of the highly publicized estrangement, fashion designer Victoria Beckham reportedly took to Reddit Tuesday to anonymously ask for someone to explain the Beckham family feud to her. “Sorry, I’m feeling kind of out of the loop here, could someone explain what’s going on with the son?” the 51-year-old Beckham […]

The post Victoria Beckham Asks Reddit To Explain Beckham Family Feud To Her appeared first on The Onion.

The post To Noem Is To Love ’Em appeared first on The Onion.

ARLINGTON, VA—In an apparent attempt to guilt his children into eating their vegetables Monday, White House deputy chief of staff Stephen Miller reportedly reminded one of his sons, a picky eater, that there were starving boys and girls in the basement who didn’t get to have any food at all. “Think of the poor, famished children […]

The post Stephen Miller Reminds Picky-Eater Son That There Starving Kids In Basement appeared first on The Onion.