TOLEDO, OH—Visibly distraught as he learned of the widespread betrayal, local mail carrier Ned Mungo expressed dismay Thursday upon realizing that the residents on his route have been receiving electronic mail for years without his knowing. “Day in and day out, I’ve been coming to these doorsteps to deliver their beloved letters and catalogues, only […]

The post Mail Carrier Hurt To Learn Residents On His Route Have Been Receiving Electronic Mail appeared first on The Onion.

LOS ANGELES—Admitting that there were some significant upsides to the deal despite the concerns it had raised, analysts at the National Research Group reported Thursday that the upcoming Paramount-Warner Bros. merger offered consumers the best shot at seeing a Sex And The City reboot starring the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. “Fans have long clamored to find out […]

The post Analysts Say Paramount-Warner Bros. Merger Offers Best Shot At ‘Sex And The City’ Reboot Starring Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles appeared first on The Onion.

Julia Fanzeres / Bloomberg:
Challenger: US tech sector job cuts rose 24%+ YoY to 18,720 in March, taking Q1's tech total to 52,000+; AI accounted for 25% of layoffs across all industries  —  Layoff announcements at technology companies continued to mount in March, leading other industries in overall US job-cut plans …

The city of Coral Springs celebrated the election of first Black and Haitian American female commissioner. Now, they're forced to mourn her shocking murder.

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Michael Nuñez / VentureBeat:
Microsoft launches in-house AI models MAI-Transcribe-1, MAI-Voice-1, and MAI-Image-2, built by its superintelligence team, as it pursues “AI self-sufficiency”  —  Microsoft on Wednesday launched three new foundational AI models it built entirely in-house — a state …