Better This Christmas

I always wanted to write a Christmas song, so here you go (performed live at The Day After Thanksgiving Ping-Pong Tournament Party):

BETTER THIS CHRISTMAS

By Charlie Harrington*

So mad at myself
That elf on the shelf
Oh, if he only knew
How good I can be
As sweet as a pea
I'll even give up my blue.

I'll be better this Christmas
I'll be better this Christmas
I'll be better this Christmas
But it better be Christmas soon

Bet ya heard I didn't listen
Messed up the kitchen
Smudged a window or two.
Just a misunderstandin'
Cause life's pretty demandin'
When you're three-foot-two

I'll be better this Christmas
I'll be better this Christmas
I'll be better this Christmas
But it better be Christmas soon

Wrote you that letter
Said I'd be better
Nothing else I can do.
Cause the clock is a-tickin'
Santa, we're playin' chicken
what are you gonna do

I'll be better this Christmas
I'll be better this Christmas
I'll be better this Christmas
But it better be Christmas soon

Now I'm closing my eyes
Hoping you'll still arrive
I left milk and cookies for you
Now I don't need a thing
But if you happen to bring
Just leave a toy or two

I'll be better this Christmas
I'll be better this Christmas
I'll be better this Christmas
But it better be Christmas soon
But it better be Christmas soon
But it better be Christmas soon!

Lots of asterisks

I listened to a recent Decoder podcast episode about how artists are just giving out songwriting credits readily, rather than face copyright issues, which explains why Olivia Rodrigo gave out credits to T. Swift and Paramore long after her album dropped. Anyway, here's who helped out with BETTER THIS CHRISTMAS:

• Story inspired by my nephew Monte
• Lyrics help from Carly, Molly, Andy, Mom during the Thanksgiving dessert doldrums
• Melody and fa-la-la-la help from Carly during our morning runs
• Musical advice text messages from Michael Byrnes throughout the week
• Performance credits to Michael Byrnes, Peter Clabby, Mikey's dad, Kevin, Patrick Clarke, and the whole Clabby-Byrnes-Harrington clan on fa-la-la-la's.

Happy Advent of Code, everyone!